Gene Simmons - Asshole (CD)

Disjointed but groundbreaking for Gene

By okie  Jun 7, 2004 | 3 out of 5 found this Asshole review helpful

Pros: Songs written by Bag + bluesy/soulful songs

Cons: Wanna-be Lennon/Dylan songs + Carnival of Souls outtakes

"Hi, I'm Gene Simmons. I have more money than most third-world countries combined." Substantially similar statements have been made several times by the man who claims to have been to bed with thousand of women."Sweet & Dirty Lov...e" never made a Kiss album, perhaps because it was too bluesey, swingy and un-Kiss like. Nevertheless, it rocks. "Carnival of Souls" only works in that the big-background-vocal Chorus part is outrageous as well as the riffs between that part and the verses. "Weapons of Mass Destruction" is a bad version of "Hate". "Waiting for the Morning Light" may have been co-written by Bob Dylan, but it's easily the worst song on the album. "Beautiful" is actually clever, catchy, and is Gene's best Beatles-influenced tune on the album. "Now That You're Gone" is also Beatles-influenced, but it sounds far too familiar. "Whatever Turns You On" has some very annoying gang-like and background vocals, but they grow on you; ultimately, the song is one of the catchiest tunes Simmons presents here. "Dog" was co-written by a fellow named Bag, and it works because of its combination of musical styles and genres. "Black Tongue" with the Zappa family is clearly one of the finest tracks on the album; it is catchy, well-arranged, and has those wonderful "Rocky Horror Picture Show" soundtrack background vocals in the Chorus...absolutely over the top! "If I Had a Gun" rivals it for top song. This one is clearly hip, but for the cheesy Oriental keyboard sound and production. It sounds retro and is very appealing--seems to poke fun of all the nuts out there. "I Dream a Thousand Dreams" makes me think of an island where a heavyset Jewish man is lounging in a chair with a bunch of women around, and I'm bored because that's not me in that chair! "Firestarter" is ridiculous. Obviously, Gene was just having some fun. But neither he nor Dave Navarro on guitar make the song sound any different from the original which I've already heard too many times by accident. "***hole," the title track, is immediately the most catchy, but gets old fast. The background vocals are out of tune and over the top, as are the lyrics. It's amusing--yes, it is--but even more amusing is the fact that the most contemporary-sounding and would-be-radio-prone song contains lyrics that will clearly ban it from ever being played. Anyway, at this point in his life, I don't think Gene cares. He has more money than he knows what to do with. The good thing is that this is much more entertaining than the '78 solo album or even Psycho Circus for that matter. I can't wait to hear Paul's new one!!!!! Read more Less